Britney Spear's is reportedly dropping the Kabbalah. Britney wrote on her web site that she is making her baby her religion. But the gossip is that money is a factor as well.

She's tired of the way [Kabbalah leaders] kept hassling her for money," says a well-placed source. "Actually, it was mostly her mother's decision. They were always asking Britney to tithe [donate a percentage of her salary]. There was a lot of pressure, and finally her mom said, 'Enough is enough'

Not surprising that she is stopping the Kaballah rap due to money. It's clear from most of the photos your see of Britney that she has a hard time affording a damn bra.
Source.

I guess I should be posting on how Britney Spear is pregnant again. Britney Spears made the official baby announcement on David Letterman last night, but most of the gossip community has known she was knocked up for weeks. But who the hell wants to look at a photo of fat Britney pregnant, or better yet, giving birth. So instead of bringing you down with Britney, I'll stiffin ya out with this fine photo of Elisha Cuthbert in a Bra and see through shirt. You can thank me later.

For the love of God will Britney Spears please sew her knees together or divorce Kevin Federline. I'm not one to judge a book by it's cover - oh wait, yeah I am - K-Fed 'appears' to be a complete idiot and unfit to raise himself, let alone two small children, wait, Britney, make that three. Whatever. It's just a crazy idea that these people are trusted to raise kids of any life form. FYI - Us Magazine is breaking the story and I'm sure has many of the more 'important' details about Britney's second pregnancy. But the greatest thing in all of these is that we can look forward to more nude Britney vagina statue's like this.

Paris Hilton has no respect for a sweet ride

Charlize Theron in Lesbian Action

Sophie Howard and Lucy Pinder get naked together

Britney Spears needs more than votes

I know Thomas Dobly is old ass stuff, but I dug his stuff. Now K-Fed has sampled Dolby's stuff without permission and Thomas Dolby has blasted back. Here's a long quote from Yahoo music to spells out the deal and provides yet more proof that K-Fed is a retard:

"Britney Spears’ husband Kevin Federline, whom I’d never heard of until a few days ago, appears to have illegally sampled one of my compositions. On his MySpace site you can download an MP3 which uses a looped sample from Mobb Deep’s ‘Get It Twisted’, which in turn copped the string line from my own song 'She Blinded Me With Science.' Now, Mobb Deep did it the right way and had his label BMG come and ask for a license. They paid me a fee and a royalty on the sales of Mobb Deep’s record. However K-Fed, as his fans affectionately refer to him, did NOT ask permission, he just went ahead and did it. He is therefore blatantly violating the copyright law. And laws aside, he owed it to me as an artist to ask if I minded that he recorded a vitriolic rap over the top of my music. It starts off 'This is for the HATERS...' and goes on to blast the media, paparrazzi and all his other critics, sparing no expletives along the way. BMG Records have also had their copyright violated, as they own the master to Mobb Deep’s record. But BMG don't want to rock the Britney boat so they are turning a blind eye. It’s pathetic! Turns out K-Fed has no management, label or lawyer, so it’s going to be hard getting hold of him. So K-Fed, if you’re reading this, I’m asking you nicely to take the track down ASAP. Or maybe you’d prefer me to come after some of your wife's ill-gotten gains?"

I really love Dolby line about coming after 'your wife's ill-gotten gains'. So sweet. I hope Dolby takes em to the cleaners.

New reports say that Britney Spears stepped on needle and was rushed to the hospital while on vacation in Hawaii. Nothing like having a hypodermic needle sticking out of your barefoot. I don't think Britney Spears needs to worry about catching anything from the needle, you've got to figure after sleeping with K-Fed a needle in the foot is like a walk in the park. Next time throw on some shoes and you might want to think about wearing a bra too.

The National Enquirer, reports (I always love to start a sentence that way - such confidence) that Britney Spears is pregnant again. And even better she's going to have the baby alone! God I only hope that's true. K-Fed just seems like such a leech. Supposedly Britney's going to shack it up in a 42G a month house in Maui and deliver the baby with her feet, or some such thing. I'd love the hear the rumor that Britney built a trailer out back for K-Fed to live in so she could be rid of him, but still have him move the lawn, and occasionally trim her bush, if you know what I mean. I just made that up, but it'd be cool if it happened. What would be even better is if K-Fed impregnated Jessica Simpson as well. Now that would make headlines. "Britney Delivers Baby with Own Feet. K-Fed Knocks Up Jessica Simpson." Good stuff if it were true.

So from this photo it would appear that Britney Spears isn't the brightest bulb in the box. It's a lovely shot of Britney Spear driving a car with her baby in her lap. Yeah, that's safe. In all fairness it seems the story follows that she was holding her kid when accosted by a bunch of photographers. So Britney had to take off to get away from the herd. But it still seems like a real dumb ass move to drive with your kid in your lap, especially when they are small enough to fit in the glovebox. No, just kidding. Why the hell would she put her kid in her lap and start driving knowing she was going to have her photo taken. The dumb ass factor is just too large.

File under Britney Spears.

The pillar of credibility InTouch is reporting that Britney Spears may be pregnant again. This based on Spear's behavior in a Malibu store where she patted her belly and said, "That's right. Baby number two." I can like totally understand how a subtle thing like patting her stomach means Britney Spears really is pregnant again, cause I regularly pat my crotch in public and say, "That's right, 10 inches baby." - and that's all true. So Britney must be.

File under Britney Spears.

Britney's boobs are carrying an AK-47 - really. What the hell does Britney Spears shirt mean? Check the link, you'll see is a freakin turtle with an AK-47. The shirt makes as much sense as her procreating with Kevin Federline, or the thought of Patrick Swayze rapping. Either one makes you want to vomit.

In an attempt to prove to the world that he is not what the media portrays - a white trash, hillbilly, lazy ass, free loading, no talent idiot - Kevin Federline has launched a website of his own. The gay Flash intro pokes fun at all the Britney / Federline break up rumors and tabloids then tell us that everything we hear isn't true and we shouldn't judge a book by it's cover. So as not to misrepresent poor Kevin I will quote from the official Federline website:

I don't think we've ever been formally introduced. My name is Kevin Federline. I'm 6 feet tall, have brown hair and brown eyes. I enjoy horseback riding, long walks on the beach and the wind whipping through my hair....there's going to be a lot more information and updates on here in the coming weeks and I think this will provide you with the opportunity to get to know who I really am.

And if you're really desperate to learn about a celebrity that shouldn't be one, you can even visit him on MySpace, where is has no friends. I think we should judge a book by it's cover and believe all the rumors. People who go to these lengths to try and fight in image or media story are usually trying to hide something, like the fact that he might indeed be a complete no-talent idiot. And I'll let you draw your own conclusions about Britney's sex tape lawsuit.

File under Kevin Federline's a nerd, Bad Web sites.

Sorry to cast a dark shadow on the holiday season, but it seems there is no Britney Spears Sex Tape. Britney Spears has called out the dogs in response to recent reports that a Pam and Tommy style sex tape existed. The suit has been filed against US Weekly for their coverage of the X-rated video story. Perhaps this is Britney's ploy to strike back after more recent gossip articles on the state of her marriage to Kevin Federline. The tabs have had a field day with stories about K-Fed being kicked out of the house and having his Ferrari taken back. Even funnier has been Britney's fans reaction to the K-Fed feud, which promoted a Divorce Kevin web site, which is probably funnier than any Britney Spears sex tape could even be, if there were one.

File under No Britney Spears Sex Tape.

You know you're already screwed just being Kevin Federline. The bad hair, your wife taking away your Ferrari, you can sing, etc… But when Britney Spears fans put up a DivorceKevin.com web site you know your just f-ked. It appears Britney Spears fans have had enough of Kevin's antics and have gone to the trouble to put a web site where you can actually sign a petition to lobby for Kevin and Britney's divorce. Sweet. Now that's love.

File under DivorceKevin.com.

Perhaps Britney Spears should have thought twice about selling her bra on eBay. Looks like it might have come in handy about now. A little make up won't hurt either. Perhaps Britney was breast feeding Kevin in the car. Whatever the case what out for Britney's high beam, well in this case low beams.

File under Britney Spears without a bra, boobs.

Britney Spears and her oldest child, Kevin Federline, have come out of baby seclusion to do things normal people do. LIke eat. Britney and her twins looked no worse for the wear. There are handful of post-pregnant Britney Spears photos out and about. We purposely chose a photo that did not have Kevin Federline and his cornrows so as not to inflict a condition on our viewers worse than the bird flu. Unconfirmed reports indicate that exclusive pictures of Sean Preston Spears Federline has been secured by People magazine in the midst of a bidding war for Britney's baby photos. We'll have to wait and see on this one.

File under Britney Spears.

Britney Spears has taken off her bra - off of eBay that is. As part of her Hurricane relief charity auction Britney had listed a jewel-encrusted bra that had been bid up to $60,000 before being taken off the auction site. Apparently Britney believed there would be some confusion about it's 'history' if you will and where it had been worn, verses what was stated on eBay. Interesting to think that someone was willing to pay 60G for some of Britney Spears boob sweat. Last week I listed some belly button link and only got like $12.50. Just shows what people are willing to pay to be close to some celebrity breasts.

File under Britney Spears.

File this one under things you don't want your kids to see. Reports are coming in that Britney Spears is concerned over a sex tape of her and dirty husband Kevin Federline. Apparently a member of Britney Spears team copied the personal home sex video and is threatening to release it. The sex footage is supposed to be a pre-bump Britney. So the world might finally see a Britney and Kevin sex tape. Britney Spears is reportedly concerned. You never know, the reports of the stolen tape could be false, as could this whole story (we only comment on the stuff folks, not report it) but you really tip your hand when it comes to sex tapes if you start freaking out when someone says they have one. See, even if they don't, and you throw the big freak, it pretty much confirms that you've probably made a sex tape, and didn't keep very good track of it (I keep my tapes hidden right behind the pop tarts, never had a problem). And I'd go so far as to say you probably made several home sex tapes and didn't keep an eye on them. It's just my guess, but I'd say this could be the case when it comes to a Britney and Kevin's sex video. Again, assuming a tape exists. Until then you can always look at Janet Jackson's hidden nude tape.

File under Britney Spears, Kevin Federline, Britney Spears Sex Tape, Celebrity Sex Tapes.

Britney Spears is selling a bunch of her personal items on auction at eBay in order to raise money for Hurricane Katrina victims. Fundamentally this is decent gesture. However many of the items are, as stated, are personal items of Britney Spears - like this pair of dirty skanky looking sandals filled with filth. As of writing this blog the pair of Britney Spears sandals shown here is up to $305 on ebay. What the hell are people thinking. It's probably some perverted dude that can't wait to lick Britney's toe filth from the bottom of them. How about some of Kevin's dirty boxers. Those would be nice.

File under Britney Spears.

Rumor on the street - or the interent - seeing as how I've got no street access, is that Britney Spears has signed a contract with OK magazine to exclusively publish pictures of her new baby. So if you're looking for Britney Spears baby pictures that's where you'll need to look. Of course this could all be BS and there will be no Britney baby photos, just more of Kevin looking unwashed and poor. But if it's true and they make a bunch of money selling photos of their newborn baby Sean Preston Spears (boy that just sounds wrong) then Kevin can afford a shower and Britney can hook up a personal trainer.

File under Britney Spears Baby Photos.

Britney Spears gave birth to a boy and is 'ecstatic'. Have you every really heard of someone saying, "yeah, I just gave birth and it sucks". It's really not news when Britney is ecstatic. Though I'm typing this crap so maybe it is. Even better news if you really idolize Britney and her baby is that her perfume Fantasy hits stores today. No word on whether or not is has the Federline odure. Click below to order.

Britney Spears Fantasy Perfume

It's now official news and no longer gossip. Major news wires have reported that Britney Spears has given birth to a baby boy at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles, via c-section. Father Kevin Federline was needlessly present, oops, I mean obviously present for the big Britney baby event. In my head I see Kevin holding a bag of cheetos waiting to nourish little Preston on the way out. Though also in my head is a empty bottle or Merlot, which problem explains any fascination for this news. Reports are that the Britney's baby will be named Preston, though there has also been talk of naming the Spears baby London. So perhaps it will be London Preston Spears Federline Cheetoh head. Or whatever the voodoo gods of the Kabbalah deem appropriate. Congrats to both, now maybe Kevin will take a f'ing shower and shave.

We interupt our compeling coverage of Fashion Week to bring you Britney Spears baby information. God only knows if this gossip is accurate, but it makes for good traffic. Britney Spears is reportedly giving birth by c-section to her baby at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles. Don't yell at us if we're wrong about Britney's baby, cause we usually are in generally. But news about Britney Spears giving birth is high on everyone's need to make their life feel complete list, so we thought we'd pass along some the unsubstantiated Britney baby info. As for photos of Britney Spears baby we're still fine tuning our upskirt hospital operating room cam. Be pateint. Stay tuned and someone try and dig up Kevin Federline for the big event.

File under Britney Spears Baby.

Britney Spears may have given birth over the weekend, or may not have given birth. Reports abound that she was rushed to the hospital in Santa Monica in which Britney would have given birth four weeks early. But Britney's people deny the rumors. So keep waiting. I guess.

File under Britney Spears Baby.

Since it seemed Britney Spears chickened out on the naked Vanity Fair Cover this is what we get. Actually I don't think it was ever confirmed that Britney was going to pose nude for Vanity Fair, a la Demi Moore, but now we get these picts from an Elle photoshoot. Which to my eye's look like they've dressed up a pregnant 14-year old in a black teddy. It's back to the Mousekateers days. Not really cool. I don't know how long ago these were taken but Elle has apparently hired some super-duper photoshop wizards to shed the ample baby weight Britney has put on. Personally I think Britney Spears naked would have sold a hell a lot more magazines. Call me crazy.

File under Britney Spears Pregnant Photos.

Britney Spears has announced the she will name her baby London Preston Spears. This in honor of the place where she met Kevin Federline. Her original pick for a baby name was Sean Preston. But now she likes London better. Personally I think the first name is 'Disa' is much better. Kind of like Diva, but not. And it's sounds so nice with Spears. Disa Spears. Nice eh.

File under Baby London Preston Spears.

E! Online is reporting that Britney Spears is entertaining the idea of during her own Vegas show. Somebody name Jack Wishna, is said to be the dealmaker venture consultant is working with a major Vegas strip property to bring in Britney Spears to do a multi-week show. So it would seem that Britney has gone from being a twenty something to a sixty something and aged faster than Celine Dion. My agent, Jack Me'Offer has been trying to get me to play Vegas for years, but like most people of true star quality I refused until I'm at least 70 and walking with a cane.

Britney Spears is denying that she freaked out and yelled at a 13-year old girl on the set of her sister Jamie Lynn's TV show. Spears is being accused of calling the 13-year old a an' evil little girl'. Also and, I personally love this one, that the girl had better watch herself or she 'will never work in this town again'. I've always wanted to yell that. I tried it last week on my garbage man after he dropped a bucket. I screamed 'you'll never work in this town again' and I threw in a bitch afterwards too. He just flipped me off. Let's hope Britney's behavior isn't an indication of her mothering skills.

The gossip coming from MSNBC is that Britney Spears is having a baby boy. Apparently some marginally observant people reported her shopping for a ton of boy stuff in Beverly Hills. Now we'll have to wait and see what a half-human half-Federline baby boy looks like. Reports have stirred for months whether or not Britney was having twins, now perhaps two boys. Stir that pot for a while.

Police are investigating how photographer Brad Diaz was shot with a BB gun while staking out a baby shower for Britney Spears. I think we can immediately figure out the motive for this one. It's actually a bit funny if you think about it. A bunch of photographers all lined up and waiting - like a power line full of crows - an then being shot by a BB gun. Seems pretty logical really. Picked off just like pesky pigeons.

You really have to love those celebrity fad religions. Reports are that Britney Spears will have a Kabbalah blessing ceremony for her new baby or babies nine days after their birth - in September. So how long before the induction into the church of Scientology? And what's the next fad religion going to be? I say we resurrect some crazy ancient shit where we all run around with dead goats on our back. That would definitely be trend setting. Any takers? Britney, Madonna? Don't get me wrong. Religion is great. Really. Everyone needs spirituality in their life. But if I have to hear one more fucking thing about Madonna and Kabbalah I think I may have to give up the public life and become a Monk.

The big buzz is that Britney Spear's due date is September - if you can call that a due 'date'. Didn't we already know this? Access Hollywood ran a 'breaking news' report for the Spears due date. We had Britney Spear's due date pegged ages ago. Like it's a big mystery. And the supposeded 'date' isn't a date at all. It's more like a month. And most you who have had babies yourself could have probably guessed this rubbish by just looking at her. Whether or not she is going to deliver in Scottsdale still remains an unknown.

Britney Spears (and her belly's) appearance at the premiere of Johnny Depp's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory may have melted Depps delusional spotlight. Britney showed up wearing a t-shirt with the slogan "I have the Golden Ticket" and an arrow pointing downward on her belly. Husband and father-to-be Kevin Federline was in tow.

It's easy to see how Depp could be upstaged. Britney's twins could stop traffic anywhere (we're talking boobs here). The mother-to-be is supposed to be giving birth late September at Scottsdale Shea Hospital, in Scottsdale Arizona. The gossip is that she's booked a luxurious second-floor private room. And even booked the rooms on either side. FYI, as of last week the hospital knew nothing of this scuttle. And I can also tell you, from first hand experience - all the room are on the second floor, and all the rooms are private. Britney's not getting anything special folks.

Look for Britney's pregnant belly on the season finale of Chaotic and her new video I Will Understand. And just a guess, but I think this may be the SERIES finale as well. Too bad.

I'd guessing Britney Spears twins weigh in at about DD these days. Smooth, round and full...Oh, weren't we talking about her breast. Oh baby. yeah that's right. Whether or not Britney Spears is having twins remains to be seen. But be assured the twin's she has now are spectacular. Now if only the rumors of Britney posing nude for Vanity Fair were true. That would truly be spectacular. Anybody want to take bets on which happens first - Britney gives birth or her show is cancelled. Anyone, anyone.

Note to self - when career is struggling immediately take off clothes. Apparently a pregnant Britney Spears already got the naked memo. Reports say she is being paid the big dollar to pose nude on the cover of Vanity Fair magazine. The photoshot is supposed to take place near the end of her pregnancy, when she's at her full girth. Demi Moore posed naked on the cover of Vanity Fair years ago - well, covered in body paint. I don't know yet if that's the plan for Britney. Paint or no paint a pregnant naked Britney Spears is going to sell some serious magazines. The reported pay out for breast bearing Britney photos is said to be in the millions. Guess if you ain't sellin' records the naked thing is the route to take. Keep your eye's peeled and your hands in your pockets.